St Louis

I had a great time in St Louis on Saturday and it was even better when the Cardinals won, espically since they beat the Braves! I love St Louis. I think that it comes from many years of family vacations every summer but just been there puts me in a good mood. When you are driving on the interstate and you can see the arch, you can't help but smile!

The new stadium is beautiful and the weather was so nice on Saturday. I started to get a little worried with all the storms in the area and they had an almost 2 hour rain delay the night before. I was feeling well but I knew that I would not have been able to wait out a rain delay and still make it through the game. Our tickets were in "Big Mac" Land so we got coupons for free Big Macs and we got foam "fries" to wave around. They put us on the jumbotron once. We had some really rude people behind us that were Braves fans. The kid kept kicking my chair and at one point when the Cardinals made a really great play they threw something at me when I stood up to cheer. It never fails that I always get stuck around drunk people who are cheering for the wrong team.

The total count for the summer is 4 ballparks, 6 games, and a ton of great memories!

Blahhhh

Tuesday night I got sick after dinner and threw-up a few times (I know that's gross but it's part of the story). I decided that I did not want to continue eating and try to retake all my medication. As I wrote before, I stopped my antibiotic for 2 1/2 days last week but evidently that was not long enough seeing that I was getting so sick. Yesterday was a real struggle, I felt like I was going to faint all morning and I couldn't eat lunch. During the afternoon I felt a little better but still not great. Last night I ate some dinner but nothing substantial. When I went to bed at 9 I fell asleep fairly quickly but I woke up at 10:30 in a considerable amount of pain. Somehow I fell asleep again until 1:30 when I woke up crying in so much pain that I thought I might not make it through the night. I had severe chest pain, racing heartbeat, stomach pain, pain in my arms and legs and a terrible headache. I decided at that point that I could no longer handle what was going on by myself. I prayed really hard for God to either take away the pain and let me sleep or to take me away to heaven. Obviously you know the result of that prayer. It's funny how sometimes when we think that we are all alone and God isn't listening that He is there and answers our prayers so quickly. I don't remember the pain going away but I know that I was still crying after I fell asleep because there were tear stains on my pillow and my shirt. Most of you are probably wondering why I chose to not call an ambulance but if you were paying my medical bills that the insurance isn't going to reimburse, you would understand. (Please don't lecture me, I know what I should have done and next time I probably will)

I felt somewhat stable this morning but as I'm writing this now I am feeling dizzy, lightheaded, nauseous, and overall blahhh. My heart still feels likes it's racing but I don't have the sharp pains that I had last night. I will not go back on my medication until I am feeling better for at least 2 full days which may take some time.

Due to other circumstances I have made plans to go with my family to see a St Louis Cardinals game this weekend which should lift my spirits. I haven't been to a game in about 4 years so I'm excited to see the new stadium and enjoy watching them play while they are winning right now. Maybe Albert Pujols will still be hitting a home run every game by the time I get there.

Please keep me in your prayers and don't be offended if I don't return phone calls or emails as I have no energy and this has taken me more than an half hour to write.

By the way, what do you think about the new look of the site? I had some down time at work and I thought it was time for a change.

Downhill slide (It's long and I'm sorry)

I have not been getting better but the downhill slide is not as steep as it was last week. I am having a lot of pain and semi-paralysis on my right side. My arm and leg just feel like dead weight and very heavy but I can still walk. Writing is difficult but if I go slow and think about it hard then I can do it. The writing is also compounded by the fact that I have been having the cognitive problems which cause me to forget my words and when I do remember them, I can't always remember how to spell them (be glad this has spell check or you would have a difficult time reading it).

I talked with a friend on Sunday night that also has Lyme disease but he is about 3 months ahead of me in the treatment process so he was able to give me some insight and a lot of encouragement. He said that he also went through this with the particular medicine that I am on now but that it did get better. He was actually doing worse than I am in some areas so I have a little bit of hope.

I know that I need to stay positive and realize that this means the medication is working but it's so difficult to stay positive when you feel worse than when you started. I was told by someone at church that if I would just think positive that I would feel better. It's a good thing that my right arm isn't working well or I might have punched him. Happy thoughts aren't going to cure me. I know that they will help, but sometimes you just don't want to be happy and other times it's just not possible to be happy.

On another note ..... My house still has not sold. The couple that might have made an offer has fallen through so now I'm back to square one. My contract with the realtor ends in 1 week and then I'm going to try and sell it own my own which will be difficult since I'm 8 hours away. If you know of anyone moving to the Jackson or Henderson, TN area please let me know or send them to this WEBSITE. It is also listed on Craig's List and several other sites. I have a family member who is a realtor in Chattanooga but there isn't much that he can do from that far away either so he has been the one so set up the websites for me. Thank God for family!!!

My brother's soon-to-be father-in-law is in the hospital right now and they aren't quite sure what is going on. He went in to have his kidney stones removed and during surgery he started bleeding internally. He was in ICU for 4 days and now he's in a private room but he's not recovering like he should be. My brother and his fiancee had to go back to Arkansas for school on Sunday so that was pretty hard on her to leave him. Please keep this family in your prayers.

On a happy note, my cousin had her twin girls a couple weeks ago and a great friend of mine had her baby girl last week. All is going well and I can't wait to meet all the new babies!

Thanks for you thoughts and prayers!

Worsening

Just wanted to update a little bit. I got a lot worse this week, it's technically called a Jarisch-Herxheimer reaction, so I have gone off my antibiotics for a short time. I have had to take a B12 shot the last 2 days in a row and I may have to have another one tomorrow. I have been having severe headaches, difficulty seeing and focusing, hands shaking, cognitive problems, fever, and severe fatigue. It has not been fun. I am sleeping better than I was and that is the only positive thing going on right now.

I have also begun to realize that there is very little that I can actually eat without making myself worse. Here's the basic list of what I can't have: sugar, fruits, starch, pork, caffeine, trans fats. Once you break this down it means that I can have some vegetables, some meat, eggs, and dairy. This is the diet that I will be on until I finish with my medication which could be up to a year.

My neighbor/realtor called on Friday and said that there was a couple interested in my house and they were working on financing. Please pray that the paperwork goes through and that they make an offer soon.

Thank you so much for all you concerns and prayers, they really keep me going!

Diagnosis ..... Finally!!

I got the official results back from my doctor this week and I do have a variation of Lyme Disease. The medication that I have already begun is the correct course of treatment so I am on the right track. Thanks for the thoughts and prayers!

Reactions

As I wrote previously, the doctors expect patients to get worse on the medication before they get better. So far, this has been the case. My vision has been more strained, I am more tired (if that is possible), I have had more muscle pain and soreness, I have also felt dizzy and lightheaded. None of these things are as bad as I expected them to be so I'm still pushing through the medication. I had the B12 shot on Friday and I felt that it worked for most of the day but by that evening I was extremely exhasusted from the wedding stuff. I feel that it would have been even worse without the shot so I consider this progress. I attempted to give myself another shot yesterday but it didn't go as planned so my grandmother had to give it to me. Hopefully I can get past whatever my fear of self-injection is and be able to give them to myself soon.

The job is going well. Right now I am doing a lot of research and brainstorming until the YMCA opens and I can actually get started. I am looking forward to it. I know that some people are worried that this isn't what I really want to do but I was ready for a change. I will be doing some high school sports coverage so that will be fun and keep me involved in the sports side of my life.

The wedding went well and she was BEAUTIFUL!!! I am glad that we don't have another wedding until next summer when my brother gets married. Weddings are stressful and a lot of work. When the time comes, I may just elope.

Keep praying for my house to sell and for my health!

Wedding Bells!

Not mine ... do you think I'm crazy?!? Today is my sister's wedding and I am so happy and excited for them, I love my new brother. I will be so glad when all of the stress is over and everyone can go back to being themselves again.

I went to the doctor this morning to get a B12 shot which should help my fatigue. Keep your fingers crossed. If it does work then I will be able to give myself shots as I need them, hopefully about once a week. The medication has been working because I have been feeling a little worse this past week. Nothing too serious but it is still frustrating.

Thanks for all your prayers, keep them coming!